losing it all

 But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ
Philippians 3:7-8

Last week, I took my last work trip to D.C. before moving to Kenya in August. It was definitely bittersweet for sure. I have had the opportunity to work with some amazing colleagues over the past two years, and I feel like I am saying goodbye to some dear friends. The inside jokes over the course of my tenure are too many to name, and the happy hours, the laughs, the trips, the late night hotel room conversations will be cherished for sure. It was quite sentimental that Washington D.C. would be the last site of my last work trip. Just two years ago, I took a very different trip to D.C

After being unemployed for three months, I was literally down to my last dollar when I received a phone call that I had been hired for my current position. I was on my way to D.C. for a networking trip through an organization I was a member of at the time. With $50 to my name in total, I was ecstatic to receive that phone call. When I checked into the hotel, they asked for a $100 deposit which I didn't have. I called my dad in tears, and he transferred the money to my account. At that moment, I swore to myself that I wouldn't be in that position again.

Fast forward two years. As the plane made the familiar passage over the Washington Monument, tears collected in my eyes as I reflected over the past two years and how much growth I've had financially, personally, and spiritually. I feel closer to God than ever and as He calls me to Kenya, I feel the gravity of losing my job, losing my health insurance, losing my comforts of home and friends, losing it all.

Why would I give up the security of a steady job and pay check? Why would I willingly put myself in a financially unstable situation? 

Because I consider everything a loss to the surpassing knowledge of Christ Jesus, and for Him, I am willing to lose it all.  Like Paul, I know what it's like to be both well fed and hungry, but I've learned to be content in all situations. Although I swore I'd never be in a financially dependent position again. That's exactly where I am headed, but there is no place I'd rather be than dependent on The Lord for all my needs. He is my sustainer, comforter, friend, father, and yes, provider. 

In a few weeks, I'll be boarding another plane heading across the Atlantic Ocean. The journey to this point has been filled with many ups and downs, but I'm clinging to my savior for all my needs to be met. For His sake, I am losing it all.

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